


many ways to give in

by novemberpest



Category: Actor RPF, American (US) Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Sebastian Stan Fandom
Genre: Drama, F/M, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Road Trip, Romance, Smut, Time Skips, just a little bit of drama though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:34:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24361396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novemberpest/pseuds/novemberpest
Summary: All she wanted to do was take a road trip, drop her car off at her brother's place and then get back home. She really, really didn't need Sebastian to come along for the ride. For some reason he was there anyway.
Relationships: Sebastian Stan/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 7





	many ways to give in

**Author's Note:**

> I'm trying this new thing where I don't overthink what I'm doing and just post stuff even though no one might like it. so, yeah. here it is, the RPF I never meant to write and no one's ever asked for - Sebastian is too pretty for me not to constantly think about though, so this happened anyway.  
> there's gonna be some time skips and chapters will definitely be longer than this prologue. I don't know when I'm updating again, but this fic is mostly planned out, so let's hope for the best, eh?  
> (you can also find me on tumblr, same username)  
> *heart emoji*

The apartment was so packed, you could barely make out the walls. People of all ages were mingling and drinking, some of them deep in conversation, others shrieking over the droning music. It was much too warm, despite the unusually cold September weather. New York City was celebrating one of their greatest and it seemed like everyone came to get a piece of her.

Dante fell deep into the cushions of the couch, barely keeping her glass of champagne from spilling. She enjoyed these kinds of get-togethers — they were far from her busy day-to-day life and there was just something about being a nameless face in a big crowd that appealed to her. Or maybe it was the opportunity to meet interesting people; because, really, if you’d meet them anywhere it was at one of Holly’s parties. As the owner of various high-end bars throughout the city she had connections to all kinds of people, and she’d never been stingy when it came to handing out invites. A true social butterfly — although Dante wouldn’t ever compare herself to her best friend, she still liked taking up that mantle every now and then.

Holly’s flavor of the day was cute, there was no denying it. Jessica sat on Holly’s lap, a hand knotted into the thick hair at the nape of her neck and giggled like a five-year-old at a children’s birthday party. Which admittedly wasn’t too far from reality, seeing as this was a birthday party — Holly’s 36th to be precise — and despite not _looking_ like she was five, there was also no way Jessica was actually 26. 

Dante loved her best friend dearly, but her taste in women had always been questionable.

“So Dante is a boy’s name right? Why do you have a boy’s name?” An obnoxious giggle spilled over Jessica's lips. “You don’t look like a boy.” 

Dante took a long drink from her champagne flute, wondering how soon the alcohol would set in. She tried to focus on the projector someone had set up on the far wall. It was currently showing some artsy black-and-white film she didn’t recognize — not that she’d recognize many films. “My father was really into racehorses, but too fucking poor to afford one. Naming his children after them was as close as he could get, I suppose”, she explained in a deadpan voice. “My brother’s name is Secretariat.” 

Holly’s girlfriend stared at her with glassy eyes, and Dante was sure, if her head had been see-through, she would’ve been able to see the new information slowly trickle through the lump of tissue she called her brain. Then, finally, she laughed. “You’re funny!”

Dante threw Holly a long look. She, however, only gave an apologetic shrug and pressed a kiss to the temple of the woman in her lap. “Bunny, why don’t you go and get us another bottle of wine? You know, the white with the pretty label?”

Jessica jumped up with all the motivation of a kindergarten child told to go get their drawing pencils. Dante genuinely hoped she would take a while.

“Look, before you say anything-”

“You cannot be serious.”

“You say that, but honestly, she’s not as bad as it seems, you just need to get to know her.”

“ _Please_ , don’t make me get to know her.”

At this, Holly threw a crumpled up tissue at Dante’s face. “Shut up, we can’t all be celibate loners like you.”

Dante only snorted into her drink, but didn’t reply. Her eyes wandered through the room, mentally listing all the birthday guests she recognized. When her eyes found a familiar head of tousled brown hair near the front door she paused for a second. 

“Or whatever it is the kids call it nowadays when they’re in love with someone for years but are too afraid to, you know, _just go for it_ ”, Holly added with a knowing glint in her eyes.

“Shut up.” Dante was really, really not in the mood to talk about him today. Which was funny, because Holly’s birthday party was really the only time she ever saw him. A week ago she’d been so sure she’d be able to deal with him but now she just wanted to hide behind the sofa.

“I’m just saying, as far as I know he doesn’t have a girlfriend right now. And he’ll actually be in the city for a while.”

“Holly, please, we’ve been over this. Last year was a fucking disaster, and I don’t want to get back to this, like, at all.” Dante swallowed hard. “Besides, I doubt he’d be interested. Sebastian was the one who-”

She stopped.

Who did _what_? What even did he do? One year later, Dante still wasn’t sure why she was actually mad at him.

“I know”, Holly supplied quietly. “I’m sorry I brought it up.”

Dante nodded, her expression carefully blank. She watched him get pulled into a hug and out of her immediate line of sight. A new group of people had arrived and were slowly pushing their way into the apartment, carrying various bottles of liquor. The music was just bassy and loud enough to effectively drown out most conversations from where they were sitting on the couch, and the champagne bubbling in her stomach actually made her calm down a little. Maybe she’d get through this evening — maybe even more successfully than the other five birthdays she’d celebrated with Holly in this place.

Her eyes didn’t stray from the front door for long, even when Jessica arrived back with a bottle of red wine clutched in her hands.

* * *

“So when are you going to Seattle?”

Dante had emptied the bottle of champagne and was now on her second glass of white wine. Her head was pleasantly fuzzy — that was the only way she could explain to herself why she didn’t run away as soon as Sebastian and Rebecca sat down opposite of her. 

She shrugged her shoulders, trying to formulate an answer to Rebecca’s question, while blatantly ignoring how his eyes suddenly snapped up from his beer to focus on her. “I’m not sure yet, I’ve got to drop the car off by the end of the month. I was thinking of making it an actual road trip to get away from the city for a little while.” Her eyes flashed to his for only a second but that was enough to shoot fire through her veins. She really hoped her face was already flushed from the alcohol she’d had.

“You’re going to Seattle?”, shrieked Holly as she reappeared with a noticeably flustered Jessica by her side. She dropped down on the armrest next to Sebastian and slung an arm over his shoulders. “So is my man Sebastian.”

There was a definite challenge in her eyes. Dante tried her hardest to ignore it. 

“You are?”, asked Rebecca, the brunette blissfully unaware of the mounting tension between them.

Sebastian cleared his throat. “Yeah, actually. One of my friends is getting married in two weeks.”

“In two weeks?” Holly’s grin widened as Dante whispered an inaudible but heartfelt _No_. “That’s perfect timing! The two of you should just travel together. That’s better for the environment, right?”

Holly — flying all across the country five times a week, can’t spell recycling to save her life, owning a wardrobe big enough for five families — was on top of her bullshit game tonight. 

Sebastian’s eyes met her own and Dante could have sworn her heart stopped for a second. She saw him consider the _possibility_ — but fuck her, if she knew what to expect from him. She didn’t understand him on the best of her days.

“I was planning to go with Ben and Muriel”, he replied in an even tone. Relief and, Dante was afraid to admit, a bit of disappointment flooded her veins as she took a long sip from her wine. “But they had to cancel because Muriel apparently can’t get off work.” 

She was already choking on her wine before his words fully registered. When her coughing abated, she almost hissed at him. “Why don’t you book a flight?”

“They’re all fully booked.” His reply came fast, sharp and unexpectedly smug.

Dante didn’t have an answer to that. She could only stare at him as she tried to understand what is happening. The way his eyes sparkled with mischief and the side of his mouth lifted _just so_ nearly drove her insane. He knew exactly what he was doing.

“You can’t refuse him, Dee!”, Holly cried from the side in a way that made Dante want to punch her in the face. As if she actually believed his bullshit.

But Holly was right. 

She couldn’t refuse him.

So without another word Dante got up and left the room.

* * *

It was well past four when Dante decided to call it a night. She hadn’t seen much more of Holly after she’d tried to force Sebastian on her, but Dante wasn’t disappointed. Holly was a social animal through and through, always moving from one person to another to talk as much as she could. Holly was also really fucking drunk and Dante much preferred her best friend sober.

Dante had spent the night carefully avoiding Sebastian, which wasn’t too hard considering the huge apartment and the sheer mass of friends that Holly had invited. It seemed like he wasn’t looking for her either, which suited her _just fine_. It was fine.

Carding through the pile of coats and jackets in Holly’s guest room was a fucking pain. Dante almost moaned with delight, when she finally felt the soft material of her coat under her fingers. She swayed a little in her heels when she pulled it free and turned to leave, trying her hardest not to think of him and how she’d touched him in this room before, or how he looked at her earlier and- 

The music was still too loud and despite the hour it didn’t seem any less crowded. Dante pushed her way through the front door, almost stumbled when she reached the stairs, but some other guest, a man with a bright grin and even brighter blue hair, quickly grabbed her wrist to steady her. She thanked him with a tight smile, so relieved to finally be on her way home that she didn’t much care about her clumsiness. Carefully she maneuvered past more people hanging out on the stairs, apparently just as content a little further away from the party’s epicenter. Dante could hardly blame them.

When she finally stepped outside the crisp night air let Dante breathe a little easier. 

It also made her realize that she was really fucking drunk.

She took an embarrassingly long time to push her arms through her sleeves — her coat was somehow upside down _twice_ — and searched through her pockets for some cigarettes. It wasn’t a habit she indulged in often, but she felt like she deserved one after getting out of this party alright.

It had to be her tired mind or her one-sided focus that kept her from noticing the door falling shut behind her a second time. But when she couldn’t find her lighter in either of her pockets, a cigarette already stuck between her lips, a hand appeared in front of her face, a lighter clutched between its fingers. 

Cold dread washed over her like a tidal wave.

She raised her eyes from his hand up his shoulders to finally settle on his face. Dante cursed her luck. _She’d almost made it._

“What, are you gonna take it?” The low timbre of his voice cut through the night like a hot knife through butter. When she looked up at him Sebastian was smiling, teasing in that soft way that only he could.

He clicked his thumb and a little flame popped out of the lighter. 

Dante looked at it for a second, then plucked the cigarette from between her lips. “I’m not your bitch.”

She took the lighter from his fingers, trying to ignore their warmth, the feel of them, and lit her cigarette up herself.

“Never said you were.” The smile was still there, but his gaze seemed a little less playful.

“That’s what this is though”, she mumbled, blowing out a cloud of smoke, “when men light up their girl’s cigarettes. It makes them their bitch.”

She met his eyes in a sort of challenge, not even knowing what reaction she was trying to provoke. 

He huffed out a laugh, looking over her shoulder for a second, before focusing back on her. “You’re not my bitch. Never intended for you to be that.”

His answer made her deflate. She handed him back his lighter and stuffed one of her hands into her pockets, dropping her gaze to her shoes. “What do you want, Sebastian?”

“How are you doing? I haven’t really seen you all night”, he asked instead, ignoring her question. 

Dante let out a long breath, looking down the street — barely seeing anything with how fast her mind was spinning. She’d actually thought she could break their streak, huh?

“This is the sixth year”, she simply said. When she faced him again, she hoped her expression was as detached as she felt at that moment — numb, even.

But the way he looked at her wasn’t at all what she expected. His gaze dropped down to her heels — she was almost at eye-level with him now — and carefully travelled up her whole body, mustering her, filing away how the past twelve months had changed her. “You look great.”

The cold night had nothing on the heat that exploded in her belly. Dante had seen that gaze before, knew its implications with every fiber of her being. But she couldn’t do it, not again, not this time. She’d burnt her fingers on this candle often enough and she’d finally learned to _move on_.

She told him as much. “I can’t do this. Not again.”

They were silent for a while. Dante had finished her cigarette by the time he spoke again.

“I wasn’t playing around earlier, you know. I’d like it, if you let me tag along to Seattle. Would be great to get a bit of fresh air.” 

Dante didn’t ask the questions that were rolling around in her mouth. 

_Am I your bit of fresh air?_

_What happens after you’ve gotten your fill?_

_Will I see you next year for Holly’s birthday again?_

She didn’t understand what she saw when she looked at him, like the information reaching her brain was jumbled, not translating correctly. His face seemed rougher and softer at the same time; older, somehow, although it had only been a year. His eyes were always the same though, cutting through her much easier than she felt comfortable with. Sebastian made her feel all hot and all cold, and it was just too much for her right then.

Dante rubbed a hand over her eyes, squeezed them shut in hopes of drowning out the pounding of her heart and the fuzziness inside her brain. She’d always been _so bad_ at saying no. 

“Look, you still have my number, right?”, she didn’t give him time to reply, because maybe he _didn’t_ and then she wouldn’t hear from him again and then everything would be fine and good, and _perfect_ , really, “Call me in the next couple days. I’m not deciding on this right now.”

His expression was boyishly hopeful when she looked at him again. “I’ll do that.” Sebastian reached for her but stopped himself quickly enough. “Thank you.”

Dante nodded, allowed herself to look at him a little longer — but turned to leave before her thoughts could turn silly again. She was ten steps away when he called her name again.

“Dante!”, and his smile was so lovely and warm, she almost went back and — “Have a good night.”

And she gave a little wave, smiled too, hoped it didn’t look as lost as she felt, but —

There was something hot and tight coiled in her stomach and she really, really wished she had come up with some excuse for tonight. 

She had learned her lesson with him, right?

When she arrived home, she decided. For once in her life she would tell someone no, she would take this trip on her own because she’d been looking forward to it for a while now. 

And Sebastian — she’d moved on. He was a grown man, he would find a way to get to Seattle without her.

This would work out absolutely fine, she knew.

Except when she closed her eyes, she saw his face, his smile; felt the ghost of his fingers on hers and — suddenly she wasn’t so sure anymore.

  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
